I’m not a churchgoer (other than weddings and funerals, I haven’t been since I was a kid), and I reckon that’s a good thing, ‘cuz church seems to be a pretty dangerous place these days. I don’t know what this guy’s story is, but I can’t help but think it’s all part of the hatred fomented by the Limpricks and savage Weiners (not to mention the Falwells and Pat Roberts) out there. “As ye sow, so shall ye reap.” Hey, I guess I actually did get a little something out of church, after all. Too bad so few of the Kristians out there don’t seem to have been paying attention.

So, looks like the octomom is shopping her birth tape around for seven figures (I know this, because it the single most important thing going on in the world). Really? Somebody would pay to see that? You’d have to pay me to watch that. If that’s something you want to see, just turn on Animal Planet and sooner or later you’ll find a Great Dane or something giving birth to a litter of pups. Same thrill, I would think (and a lot cheaper).

“Save Rocky, the Snakehead Fish” t-shirts will be available soon. I don’t know if they’ll keep Rocky out of the frying pan, but Rocky’s dad says the money will be going to benefit animal rescue groups. I see no reason why the DEC feels compelled to execute a ten year old pet fish that lives in a 200 gallon aquarium. Certainly, they could look the other way or give him a special permit or something. This is the same DEC, you may recall, that tranquilized a poor harmless little black bear to death last May. Bastids.

Friend-o-swift boaters T. Boone Pickens (who also worked to get Bush selected over Al Gore, and who admitted to voting for John McCain and the “Drill Baby, Drill” party on Bill Maher this week) says it’s not about Political Parties. Glad to hear it, Boonie, and, while I’m on board with the whole wind thing, I have to say “fuck you very much” for eight years of Bush – that, thank goodness, didn’t turn into 8 – 16 years of McCain/Palin.

Lots of rain around here over the weekend. Walking on it, the ground feels as though you’re walking around on a big wet sponge, and there’s lots of flooding all over the place. If it would stay in the 50’s, I wouldn’t mind so much, but 38 degrees and rain just plain sucks. I’d rather have snow. Especially since I just ordered new Gore-Tex® gloves and an Elmer Fudd (or maybe Floyd R. Turbo) hat. By the time they get here, it’ll be too warm to wera ’em. Now I’ll have to try not to lose them before next winter.

Oh well, time to be a happy idiot, and struggle for the legal tender. Have a happy Monday.