Hawaii’s Governor – Linda Lingle, formerly best know for her part in covering up the whole Obama was born in Kenya scandal – vetoed a bill that would have permitted same-sex civil unions. First off, if gay marriage was gonna be legal anywhere it ought to be legal in the land of grass skirts and coconut bikinis where everybody gets lei’d when they get off the plane. Second, if you look at Lingle’s photo, it seems clear that she needs to get lei’d more often. Third, “Linda Lingle lei’d” is fun to say. And finally, why in the hell does there need to be a law? It seems pretty clear to me that if one person is allowed to marry another peron, then there shouldn’t need to be a law to keep from discriminating against people based on the gender of one or the other or both of those persons. And the whole Rick Santorum “man on dog” nonsense or the “incest” argument is silly, too. A law that says you can’t marry your Schnauzer is fine, because it applies to all humans equally. And you can’t marry your cousin or brother or sister, regardless of your (or their) gender, so that’s not discrimination either. But I guess it’s just too complex an issue for my tiny little brain to understand.

Speaking of losers with lots of ‘Ls’ in their names (not to mention tiny little brains), Lindsay Lohan got 90 days in jail for being stupid or something (can’t say as I’ve really been paying attention, but the headlines are hard to ignore). Not to worry, though. Looks like she won’t really have to do much of her time. It’s kind of too bad, because I think it might do her some good. But mostly I don’t really care (and I’m not quite sure why anybody else would, either.

Always wanted to go to college, but been afraid you might get “credits?” Well you’re in luck, ‘cuz now you can attend Glenn Beck U. Well, not attend really, since it’s online only, but you’ll have the opportunity to learn from the best without acquiring any credit hours.

“Beck University is a unique academic experience bringing together experts in the fields of religion, American history and economics. Through captivating lectures and interactive online discussions, these experts will explore the concepts of Faith, Hope and Charity and show you how they influence America’s past, her present and most importantly her future.”

Professors will include pro-family advocate David Barton, business guru David L. Buckner and Lousiana State University political science professor James R. Stoner Jr., who told Inside Higher Ed he was “delighted” to accept Beck’s offer.

God bless you, Glenn Beck. And God bless Glenn Beck U, too.

While I often visit the Huffington Post, for some reason, I think of it as the “Crappington Post.” Why? Maybe because of its incessant “what did Michelle Obama wear” stories. Or maybe because of its “sports” section, which, at the moment, has headlines like “Serena Williams: I Have ‘Big Boobs, Massive Butt'”, “Surprise! Stunning Lingerie Model WILL Run Naked After World Cup Loss”, “Chris Evert Comes Clean About Greg Norman Split”, and “SHOCK: Psychic Octopus Stuns Germany With World Cup Pick”.

That’s right, sportsfans. A psychic octopus. Not as cute as a prescient panda, but still….

OK, time to get out there and sweat out another day.