Today’s my brother’s birthday. He’s, let’s see, let me do the math here…. He’s old. A lot older than I am, so that makes him really old. Also, if you’re bored, looking for something to do tonight, and happen to live within 50 miles of the State Theatre in Ithaca, NY, you should go and see a young man by the name of Marc Maron. I understand he’s quite a funny fellow. Also appearing will be Eugene Mirman, and Kurt Braunohler. I guess with a name like “brown holer” your career choices are pretty much either comedian or mass murderer. At least if you attended any of the schools I did, growing up.

Sadly, I live about 53 miles from the State Theatre, and therefore will not be attending (which is pretty shameful, considering how I once upon a time whined that Maron would never come near Central NY, but, well, money is tight, and I feel bad that I haven’t listened to WTF in a long time, being forced to give it up as one of those luxuries I can no longer afford – on the bright side, by not going to something I wasn’t going to go to anyway, I saved more than enough money to order a Jawstand that will quite nicely complement my Jawhorse). And, well, Maron and I really aren’t as close as we used to be anyway.

There was a time we’d sit and chat over coffee pretty much every weekday morning (oh, sure, they were kind of one-sided conversations, and I always got the feeling he never really heard what I was saying, but, what the hell, being married I’ve gotten used to that sorta thing). Alas, those days are long gone. More than five years gone, if you can believe it. And then he started referring to people as “his stalkers,” and I don’t want to make him nervous or uncomfortable or anything and I’m really not the type to bring cookies (though if I thought I could get away with it, I’d stuff a cat or two in his backpack while he wasn’t looking).

Just ‘cuz I’m not going tonight doesn’t mean you shouldn’t, though (or your brother, if he happens to live in Ithaca – not mine; he lives in Florida). I advise you to get there early, too, since it’s going to be very warm today (already 50’ish), and even at this time of year with the trees naked of leaves, it’s a beautiful area. “Ithaca is gorges” as they say, and it’s a nice little commie/socialist enclave that everybody should feel welcome at.

I mean, people like Rod Serling taught at Ithaca College (which houses the Rod Serling archives and is home to the annual Rod Serling Conference), and of course we all know that Cornell turned out such wild-eyed radicals as Keith Olbermann, Kurt Vonnegut, Bill Maher, and Ruth Bader Ginsburg (Ann Coulter and Paul Wolfowitz, too, I’m sorry to say – but the dark side is just too strong in some people).

I must warn you, however, that, what with the weekend coming and all, today’s warm weather is supposed to turn to shit at some point overnight, with cold air from Canada (stupid Canadians) smacking into the warm air and leading to fierce winds and snow. So watch out you don’t get caught in some shitty weather.

Still, spring was nice while it lasted, and I’m just grateful that I was able to spend most of it sitting at a desk in a windowless office.

Speaking of which, time to get going.