Teabagging TechniqueWith nothing much really going on in Congress yesterday (other than Republicans laughing their asses off at how simple it was to have their way with Barack “Neville Chamberlain” Obama – and licking their robust chops while wiping the spittle from their enormous jowls as they salivate in anticipation of “negotiations” yet to come), Michele Bachmann took time out to demonstrate proper teabagging technique to reporters. This, apparently, is the secret to the success of her marriage.

“God appeared to me in a vision,” the Congresswoman said, “and He spoketh unto me, ‘Michele, honey, Marcus has a void that you’re just not equipped to fill. But there’s something else you can do for him.’

“So I close my eyes, open my mouth, and then he, well, here, let me demonstrate….”

And afterwards they go out and get another foster child. No boys, though – only teenage girls.

“Marcus has the boys from his ministry. These girls are my reward from Lord God Almighty, for my service unto Him.”

It’s a touching story of two people in love. Or something.

As far as anything else going on in the world, I am officially in denial. Wake me up in 2016 (if we get through that whole end of the Mayan calendar thing).