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Morning Seditionists

So Long, September

Posted by pjsauter on September 30, 2011
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I just finished reading a book last night (no, no, I’m not proud). Not sure what the name of it was – or who it was written by. It’s one of many Kindle freebies I’ve read. In fact, in the year or so I’ve had the thing, I haven’t paid for a book yet – and I’ve read some pretty good ones that I’d not have been exposed to otherwise. So I think it’s paid for itself by now. Anyhow, this book takes place in and around London, and at one point, one character is wondering what’s real and what isn’t and the other is telling him he really shouldn’t start thinking that way or he’ll go nuts, because everything’s a matter of perception (or something).

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Happy Coffee Day

Posted by pjsauter on September 29, 2011
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I’m not much of a baseball fan, but congratulations to the Boston Red Sox for completing yet another epic choke and missing the MLB playoffs. Coupled with the Patriots losing to Buffalo (Buffalo. Hah!) last week, my hope is that this is particularly devastating to my friends to the east of Lake Champlain. Keep electing the likes of Scott Brown, and this is the miserable existence you can expect. If you want to save yourselves, vote for Elizabeth Warren, or not only will you never win another championship, but the Yankees will win every World Series forever. And nobody wants that.

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Wednesday

Posted by pjsauter on September 28, 2011
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Be afraid, America. Be very afraid. The Killer Cantaloupes are out there – and they’re looking for you. These serial killers have left 13 (or 16 – depends on which story you look at) dead in their wake. And there’s nothing you can do to save yourself. Well, except not eat cantaloupe. But who can resist the sultry, seductive siren song of a nice firm melon? I can, actually. But few have my strength.

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Tuesday

Posted by pjsauter on September 27, 2011
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I saw yet another “news” story this morning about how American kids are stupid and rank far lower than other kids around the world (and it’s only gonna get worse now that Sue’s out of the business). The suggestion was to sit down and watch Sesame Street with your 2-yr old. That’s fine, I suppose, but it’s not really gonna help that much. First, ban the rash of “teevee for morons” programming that’s become all the rage these days. You know, shows like Dancing with the Washed-Up Has-Been Morons, Are You Smarter Than a Moron, Jersey Shore Morons, America’s Got Morons, Moron Survivor, and American Idiot. Oh, and Fux News.

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Monday

Posted by pjsauter on September 26, 2011
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So those two dudes who were, for some reason, hiking in the vicinity of Iran and accidentally (so they say) crossed the border and spent a couple of years locked up in an Iranian prison are finally out. Good for them. They say it was never their intention to cross the border. Well, OK, fair enough. Not to blame the victims or anything, but, well, I think it would be prudent to stay the hell away from that part of the world.

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Sunday

Posted by pjsauter on September 25, 2011
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Just getting around to watching Bill Maher from Friday night. I had a vague dislike for Jane Harman when she was a DINO in Congress, though I didn’t really know all that much about her. Glad to see my dislike was justified. I found myself wishing she’d just shut the fuck up. Michael Moore was on the panel next to her, and I kept hoping he’d just lean over and swallow the skank (who appears to be in training for the coveted “Nancy Reagan Shriveled Husk” award) up in one bite. Bill also had Tom Morello on. Is he any relation to Joe Morello, whose “Rudimental Jazz” was my drumming bible? Much like the Catholic Bible, it was something I never mastered and wound up giving up on – at least with Joe’s book, I could just sit there without that ridiculous kneeling-standing-sitting routine I remember from Sundays of yore. Normally, I’d have watched Bill yesterday morning but I couldn’t ‘cuz I spent most of the day cowering in a bunker in an undisclosed location, praying that the big nasty satellite didn’t hit me. Much to my chagrin, when I emerged I found out the sucker had actually come down while I was still in bed. I hope all of you are similarly unscathed. Sadly, now I’ve pretty much wasted the whole weekend. Good thing I love my job.

Autumnal F*cking Equinox

Posted by pjsauter on September 23, 2011
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Thirty-six years ago today (more or less) “Money for Nothing” was the number one song. Not exactly Dire Straits’ best effort (not even anywhere near the best song on the “Brothers in Arms” album; I think I’d have to go with the title track there), IMHO, but not exactly the worst song I’ve ever heard, either. Not a song you’d have heard on Canadian radio starting back in January, because it was banned by the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council. Why? Because it uses the word “faggot” (and they aint talking about cigarettes or bundles of sticks, either), and a single listener of CHOZ in Newfoundland bitched about it. Read more

Thursday

Posted by pjsauter on September 22, 2011
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Speaking of West Virginia (which, by the way, is having a T-Shirt Amnesty Day), my buddy and fellow SU Alum (though he went through school via the more traditional route of going there after high school and graduating in the “normal” amount of time, so he was there about 25 years before I was) is taking some vacation time in October and wants to go to the SU-WV game. On the one hand, I try to get to at least one game a year and this could be the last time I see WV in the Dome for a while. On the other hand, it’s a Friday night game (and past my bedtime), and is kind of expensive. Not that I’m cheap, mind you, but the game’s gonna be on ESPN in HD, which means I can have a much better seat (and turn it off if things start to get bad) – at the expense of having to listen to the inane blathering of whatever ESPN announcers are working the game (typically we don’t get the “A” team, though occasionally they’ll give an SU alum or two (like Sean McDonough or Mike Tirico) the chance to go back to the old homestead. A shame they don’t give alumni a ticket deal. One more reason they’ll never get any donations out of me.

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Wednesday

Posted by pjsauter on September 21, 2011
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John Boehener – already reeling from the increase in tanning booth fees – doesn’t wanna talk about “taxing the rich.” I assume that’s ‘cuz he’s rich. Until such time as I become rich, I’m more than happy to not only talk about taxing them, but to actually do it. Once I’m rich, I’ll be happy to pay taxes. Why? Because I’ll be able to afford to, because I’ll be fucking rich. This does not strike me as a complicated issue, but perhaps that’s because I’m just a simple man. It’s kinda like the 7-Eleven rule. “Got a million, leave a million. Need a million, take a million.”

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Go Ahead – Ask. Now I Can Tell!

Posted by pjsauter on September 20, 2011
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I was driving around on Sunday, heading into Pixley to do my weekly shopping, and had NPR on the radio. Studio 360 was, for some reason, doing some sort of an in-depth story on Nirvana (not the place we all hope to go to when we cross over, but the band that was a big deal to angst-filled kids back in the late 80s and early 90s – I was still more or less a kid back then, but I somehow missed the boat to Nirvana – story of my life – and am more or less totally unfamiliar with them, except to say “Danny Goldberg sucks!” Guess I was just living on the wrong coast). Some guy said something to the effect that it was very apparent in all of their lyrics that they were “so messed up inside they could explode at any moment.” And then they played a song to illustrate that fact.

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