Normally, I’d bitch about it being Monday and having to go to work. But, with the news that there really, truly, actually seems to be 10 episodes and a movie of Arrested Development in the works, I guess things aren’t all bad.

A new survey says Americans are planning on spending more on Halloween this year.

Uh…. Huh?

People spend money on Halloween? My plan is to spend the same amount as usual. In other words, sit in the house will the lights out and curtains closed, appearing to not be home. This will be the first one living here, and I don’t know if any little bastards darlings will show up with their hands out or not. So I guess I’d better be prepared, just in case. I was thinking of printing copies of my school tax bill and handing them out.

There you go, you’re welcome, you little ingrates.

Your goddamn parents should be bringing me food in gratitude for my subsidizing those little germ factories they ship you off to every day so they can get the hell away from you for a few hours – pawning you off on some poor civil servants who spent the time and money to get masters degrees, all for the privilege of having you stare back at them picking your noses, drooling, slack-jawed, and dull-eyed as they make an effort to teach you something to keep you from being a complete and total drain on society – not sending you to my house begging for bite-sized Snickers® bars.

You’ll probably all grow up to be teabaggers and wanna cut off my social security.

It’s October now, which of course means the flu shot propaganda machine is now in full, um, whatever it is that machines get fully into. Where I work, they make a huge deal of it – even putting a little red (or whatever the color de l’an is) sticker on your ID card to show that you’re a docile and compliant employee, and therefore safe to approach. Fortunately for me, I have no desire for people to consider me safe and/or approachable, so this is no incentive for me.

We also have to take an annual “flu vaccine” awareness training course. This amounts to reading their propaganda sheet, and then taking a ‘test’ (the test consists of one question – “did you read the propaganda sheet?”). As it’s a test and not, like, an oath to God Almighty or something, I assume it’s OK to guess. I mean, isn’t that what they tell you before you take the SATs? If you don’t know, don’t waste a lot of time. Take your best guess. Of course, as there are only two answers, and since they allow you to keep taking the test until you get a “passing score” (which in this case is 100%), I’m assuming most people eventually pass.

I, of course, study the flu fact sheet quite carefully, as evidenced by the amount of time I allocate to “training” on my weekly justification for my my purpose in life (or at least at work).

Goddamn it, I was waiting on pins and needles for a verdict in the Amanda Knox Italian Circus event, and now they tell me a verdict won’t be issued until this afternoon. Well, damn. How am I gonna concentrate at work knowing that the fate of this innocent little girl (or perverted, craven murderer, depending on your opinion) has yet to be decided? It’s hard enough not knowing the whereabouts of that missing woman in Aruba.

So, with all this stuff up in the air, today is gonna be a long one. Plus, not only did I stay up too late last night, but I didn’t really sleep all that well (knowing that today was “the day” for Amanda), and I got up even earlier than usual (so that I could watch her plead her case – live, and in Italian, which I mostly don’t understand, but they sure do all talk about this ‘Bony Sarah’ chick a lot, whoever she is – on the Intertubes).

Oh well, time to get going, I guess.