I’m sure everybody’s read the story about the brutal attack in London where a British soldier was hacked to death. British PM David Cameron called it an “act of terror.” So I’m now waiting for Darryl Issa and Fox News to condemn him for not calling it a “terrorist attack,” which of course is something completely different.

On the list of places I’m glad I don’t live, Arkansas is definitely in the top ten, I think (there’s actually a tie between lots of places for that number 10 spot). Why? Well, for example, Arkansas wingnut Tom Cotton attempted to introduce an amendment to the Nuclear Iran Prevention Act of 2013, which seeks to penalize anyone who violates human rights, engages in censorship, or commits other abuses associated with the Iranian government. That doesn’t go far enough for Uncle Tom, though.

Cotton also seeks to punish any family member of those people, “to include a spouse and any relative to the third degree,” including, “parents, children, aunts, uncles, nephews nieces, grandparents, great grandparents, grandkids, great grandkids,” Cotton said.

“There would be no investigation,” Cotton said during Wednesday’s markup hearing before the House Foreign Affairs Committee. “If the prime malefactor of the family is identified as on the list for sanctions, then everyone within their family would automatically come within the sanctions regime as well. It’d be very hard to demonstrate and investigate to conclusive proof.”

So, like, if your Uncle does something bad, bam – you’re going to jail for 20 years, no questions asked. You didn’t have to even know about it and since it would be hard to prove, we just won’t require any proof.

It’s kind of like what happens to the families of Chinese or North Korean dissidents who mysteriously disappear.

After it was brought to Tom’s attention that this was actually unconstitutional, he reluctantly withdrew his amendment. Oh, that pesky constitution. Better luck next time, Tom.

Getting out of the shower this morning, I slammed my toe on the metal ridge where the shower doors used to slide (before I took them out and put up a regular shower curtain). Slammed it so hard, it bled, even. And it was the bad toe on the bad foot, so it really hurt like a son-of-a-bitch. Then I smacked my knee getting into the car to go to work, and that still hurts. And, just now, I yawned so hard I pulled my trapezius muscle. I have a feeling this is gonna be a sucky day.

So I just calculated my biorhythms, and the bad news is that I’m on a downward trend for physical, intellectual, and emotional – and I’m not even bottomed out yet. Things look pretty bad for Memorial Day weekend. Fortunately, the weather is gonna suck, too. Well, not suck, really. But it’s gonna be pretty cool, so I don’t think there will be any swimming going on. But maybe I can get some shit done – assuming my body doesn’t completely fall apart, in which case I’ll just sit out in the sun and read.

But first, I gotta get through today.