The invasion of the nauseatingly hot weather has arrived (I know it’s worse in other places, but relative to what we’re used to around here, this is icky). Yesterday was definitely pool weather – up around 90° and humid, and today is supposed to be even hotter. It’s already about 75° out there. Yesterday I could at least stay near the pool and hop in every ten minutes or so, but today I’m ostensibly working (albeit from home) so I won’t be able to do that (as much).

Plus my home office is hotter than hell. It faces due west and in the afternoon it gets pretty miserable. Too goddamn many computers, I think. Plus the little fridge. I’m still trying to find a way to add a/c, ‘cuz the ceiling fan just doesn’t cut it. Right now, my little wall thermometer says it’s 84° in here with a relative humidity of 85%. That’s a heat index of 96°.

I guess I could try putting together a homemade swamp cooler (basically get a tub-o-water, stick one end of a towel in it, and drape the rest of the towel over a fan). This is how Thomas Alva Edison saved the life of a neighbor child with a high fever, if the play I saw about him in sixth grade can be believed – though I don’t recall them mentioning that Edison executed Topsy the elephant because he was pissed that Tesla and Westinghouse’s AC beat out Edison’s DC.

Asshole.

Anyhow, so, yeah, it’s gonna be hot today.

So, are you a woman of childbearing age who doesn’t really want a kid right now but would still kinda like to get laid once in a while? Or maybe a woman who has a medical condition that would make it appropriate for you to take birth control pills? Or maybe a guy who knows (in the biblical sense) a woman but neither of you are really into having kids – at least not at the present time?

Bummer for you.

Well, bummer for you if work for one of the 82 or so “closely held companies” that are now planning to remove birth control from your health insurance plan, thanks to yesterday’s SCOTUS ruling.

I don’t think I’ll be patronizing Hobby Lobby anytime soon. Not much of a threat, I know, as I don’t tend to frequent “craft” stores. But if I ever need some styrofoam or a picture frame or some dried leaves or glitter or shit, I’ll be going to Michaels. Mostly ‘cuz they just closed and gutted the AC Moore by where I work.

Not that will exactly help any women who can’t afford birth control and work at Hobby Lobby. If anything, it would be to make things worse for them, really.

So I’m calling on all Hobby Lobby employees who are denied contraception and therefore get abortions to mail those aborted fetuses to:

Hobby Lobby Stores, Inc.
7707 S.W. 44th Street
Oklahoma City, OK 73179

Alternatively, you can send them to:

John Roberts c/o
The United States Supreme Court
1 First St NE
Washington, DC 20543

Of course, if it turns out that sending aborted fetuses via the US mail is illegal (say, it falls under the definition of medical waste or something), then you should not do that. Please check all applicable federal, state, and local regulations before sending anything via the USPS or across state lines.

Better yet, take a selfie with your aborted fetus, and e-mail or tweet it to Hobby Lobby, HL’s CEO and Founder, David Green, and/or SCOTUS. #ThanksHobbyLobby

And then post your pictures here (as long as they’re not too gross, please).

Of course if you don’t really care about the right to contraception, perhaps you care about the right to organize with your colleagues and form a union? Well, sucks to be you, too. Our activist Supreme Court also voted to allow scabs to opt out of paying union dues (or shop fees if they don’t want to join a union). So they can reap all the benefits that come from banding together and being able to negotiate from at least a slightly stronger position than would otherwise be possible without having to support the process. So they can save a few bucks today and the cost of major bucks (and decent working conditions) tomorrow.

I’d say people aren’t stupid and short-sighted enough to fall for that, but, well, I’ve seen the people out there and it aint a pretty picture.

I just thank goodness I live in NY and not, say, Arkansas or Mississippi or Texas something (I’d throw OK in there, too, but you already have Hobby Lobby and the likes of Tom Coburn and James Inhofe on your hands, and I don’t want to pile on).

Oh well, time to make the coffee, I guess. It’s almost time to get to work.