I had to shut off the CNN video I was just watching. They were interviewing some freelance journalist who’s over in the Ukraine and witnessed the missile strike on the Malaysia airline flight. When he said there were body parts raining down from the sky and you had to be careful where you stepped so you didn’t step on human organs, I decided I’d had enough. So, was it the Russkies? Or the Russky-lovers? Either way, it’s Obama’s fault for not going to the border to look at Guatemalan child refugees. Or something.

Speaking of Obama and the Refugees (good name for a boy-band), the mayor of Syracuse wrote him a letter to tell him we’ve got room and would be happy to take some of them in. I have no doubt that this story engendered lots of vicious responses from Republicans and Teabaggers (the mayor being both a woman and a Democrat – oh, the horror!), but I didn’t read the comments. I’ve become pretty good and not scrolling to the comment section, though I wish they’d make you have to click a link to read them. I find that if I read the ones form the idiots it only serves to piss me off and then I start to reply and then I just don’t bother because trying to reason with these people is like trying to reason with a cat.

Speaking of cats, I think I mentioned that we had one that was gone for 3 or 4 weeks who I’d pretty much given up on until she wandered back in one day, and there was much rejoicing.

I’ve always been nice to her since I’m nice in general (or so I’d like to think) and I like critters (even cats, though truth be told, they aren’t my favorites). But I’ve tried to be especially nice to her lately to kind of encourage her to stick around because my wife worries about her. So two night ago I was in the process of being nice to her and she started to nibble on my finger (which she does) and then she proceeded to chomp down and sink her fucking teeth into my thumb she actually punctured it in the meaty part and through the nail (right at the bottom of the little half-moon part – aptly called the lunula).

This hurt. Alot.

“Gosh,” I said. “Why ever did you do that, you silly cat you?” I’m paraphrasing there.

By yesterday, my thumb was all kinds of swollen and my whole forearm was sore (with a red streak running from my thumb to my elbow). This kind of worried me, so I came home and had a beer or two. This seemed to help, in that I stopped worrying. Then I opened the bit up with my trusty exacto knife and applied alcohol from the outside. I’ve also been taking massive doses of oil of oregano and turmeric (on the orders of the boss) and rubbing tea tree oil on the afflicted area. Still hurts, but it seems better, and hopefully it’ll clear up because I really don’t want to have to go to the urgent care and tell them my goddamn cat my wife’s goddamn cat bit me, and to have them tell me my blood pressure is high.

Just give me some Amoxicillin. And, yeah, I have a primary care physician. I went to him once back in 2004 or so – I think his name is Seth, though I always think of him as Skippy. He seemed like a nice enough kid and he even offered to stick his finger up my ass, but as I was only looking for a referral to a Chiropractor, I declined.

Needless to say, I am no longer going out of my way to be nice to the cat. I’m actually going out of my way to avoid her, because when I look at her I have the urge to either strangle her or hit her with a 4-pound sledge hammer (which I keep handy on the kitchen table, so it’s pretty tempting to go send her to visit Boomer).

As I’m sure you know, the World Lacrosse Championship semifinals were last night, and the godless Canadians knocked the hometown Iroquois team out of the tourney with a 12-6 win while Team USA beat the Aussies 22-3. The Championship game is Saturday (but you already knew that).

Oh well, time to make some coffee. We were up late last night, and I’ve gotten off to a slow start. Good thing it’s Friday.