{"id":3614,"date":"2010-07-21T06:55:27","date_gmt":"2010-07-21T10:55:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/morningseditionists.com\/msblog\/?p=3614"},"modified":"2010-07-21T06:58:21","modified_gmt":"2010-07-21T10:58:21","slug":"hump-day-10","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/2010\/07\/21\/hump-day-10\/","title":{"rendered":"Hump Day"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>If I live  long enough, I suppose I&#8217;ll be pleasantly surprised to wake up on any given morning.  At this point, though, it kinda just sucks.  At least on weekdays.  But it&#8217;s a special, exciting day today, as my new lawnmower is set to arrive.  Yes, that&#8217;s pretty much what it&#8217;s come down to.  Our old lawnmower, which is a Wal-Mart special (bough back before I became enlightened) that has to be about 12 years old, and cost, I think, $99.  So I guess we&#8217;ve gotten out money&#8217;s worth.  The new one is electric, and while I&#8217;m happy about the lack of noise, fumes, gas, and oils (and the fact that it&#8217;s really, really light), I&#8217;m a bit dubious as to the whole extension cord thing.  Especially since my stepson has been kind enough to cut the grass for us most of the time.  He&#8217;s a good kid, but, well, you know how kids are.  He isn&#8217;t real good at taking direction (&#8220;yeah, yeah.  I know&#8221;) and I don&#8217;t always get the sense that he&#8217;s paying attention, so I figure there&#8217;s an &#8220;oops&#8221; in our future (I just hope that when it happens, the grass isn&#8217;t wet).  Oh well.  We shall see.<\/p>\n<p>But there&#8217;s even more excitement today, as my new finish nailer is coming, too.  I have a brad nailer, which is pretty handy, and a framing nailer (which has a pretty good kick; you don&#8217;t wanna forget to rotate the exhaust away from your face), but I needed something in between.  <\/p>\n<p>Not so exciting is the news that <a href=\"http:\/\/abcnews.go.com\/Entertainment\/wireStory?id=11208297\">Playboy is launching a new non-nude website<\/a> called SmokingJacket.com.  Woo-hoo.  Next, maybe somebody will open an alcohol-free bar, or maybe a Hooters where the servers dress in haz-mat suits.  <\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>Playboy on Tuesday launched a new, non-nude website that it described as being safe-for-work and a &#8220;satirical antidote to the drudgery of the work day.&#8221;<br \/>\n[&#8230;]<br \/>\n &#8220;The smoking jacket isn&#8217;t just something I like to wear around the mansion,&#8221; Playboy&#8217;s iconic founder Hugh Hefner, 84, says in a video posted on the site. &#8220;It&#8217;s Playboy&#8217;s safe for work website. Next to the mansion, it&#8217;s the best hangout on the planet.&#8221;<br \/>\n[&#8230;]<br \/>\nOn Tuesday, the new site had posts such as &#8220;How to Get Laid at Work,&#8221; and &#8220;How to Hang Out with Porn Chicks&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>Photos include a spread of Playmate Kimberly Phillips in lingerie and a smoking jacket. From the archives, there&#8217;s the 1983 Playmate Playoffs featuring bikini-clad women with classic Farrah Fawcett-styled hair competing in water-soaked events.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>First off, I thought the whole &#8220;drudgery&#8221; of the work day was, like, &#8220;working,&#8221; not surfing the Internet.  Second, I don&#8217;t know about where <strong><em>you<\/em><\/strong> work, but where I work, I&#8217;m pretty sure that pictures of wet, scantily-clad women and tips about hanging out with porn &#8220;chicks&#8221; and getting laid at work (I guess every day is hump day at the Smoking Jacket) are most decidedly unacceptable and not safe for work.  Unless maybe you work with a bunch of adolescent boys testing video games or something.  <\/p>\n<p>We can all rest easy today knowing that <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cnn.com\/2010\/SHOWBIZ\/07\/20\/lohan.jail\/index.html?hpt=C2\">Lindsay Lohan is behind bars<\/a> (by that, I mean in jail &#8211; not, you know, out behind the bar, which is where she was Monday night.  Word has it that Jack Nicholson and Otis Young took her out for one last fling).    <\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>The actress, wearing a top that exposed part of her back, was surrounded by deputies and was quickly walked to a nearby side door labeled &#8220;secure area.&#8221;<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Does <strong><em>everything<\/em><\/strong> necessitate a fashion report these days?  What&#8217;s next?<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>&#8220;Elana Kagan, wearing big stupid earrings and a simple strand of faux pearls beneath a green sport coat met with Senator Lindsey &#8220;Lohan&#8221; Graham this morning, shortly before her nomination to the Supreme Court was approved by the Senate Judiciary Committee.  Graham, wearing a rhinestone thong and gold nipple ring, was the only Republican on the Committee to cross party lines and vote in favor of Kagan&#8217;s nomination.&#8221;<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Well, it&#8217;s about that time, so I guess I better go put on a clean thong and head out to work and learn how to get laid and hang out with porn chicks.<\/p>\n<p><object width=\"430\" height=\"259\"><param name=\"movie\" value=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/wt1kK8gsag4&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1\"><\/param><param name=\"allowFullScreen\" value=\"true\"><\/param><param name=\"allowscriptaccess\" value=\"always\"><\/param><embed src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/wt1kK8gsag4&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1\" type=\"application\/x-shockwave-flash\" allowscriptaccess=\"always\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" width=\"430\" height=\"259\"><\/embed><\/object><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If I live long enough, I suppose I&#8217;ll be pleasantly surprised to wake up on any given morning. At this point, though, it kinda just sucks. At least on weekdays. But it&#8217;s a special, exciting day today, as my new lawnmower is set to arrive. Yes, that&#8217;s pretty much what it&#8217;s come down to. Our [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3614","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3614","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3614"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3614\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3616,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3614\/revisions\/3616"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3614"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3614"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3614"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}