{"id":5580,"date":"2011-05-22T07:57:12","date_gmt":"2011-05-22T11:57:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/morningseditionists.com\/msblog\/?p=5580"},"modified":"2011-05-22T07:57:12","modified_gmt":"2011-05-22T11:57:12","slug":"life-in-a-post-apocalypse-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/2011\/05\/22\/life-in-a-post-apocalypse-world\/","title":{"rendered":"Life in a Post-Apocalypse World"},"content":{"rendered":"

I didn’t see anybody floating up to heaven yesterday. I did see some airplanes, though, and there was a rainbow in the sky at about 7:00 PM EDT (which would be 6:00 EST, which I’m pretty sure is God’s time zone) even though it hadn’t rained, so I was kind of thinking that was the bridge to heaven. Nobody appeared to be crossing that bridge, though, so maybe it’s just that nobody in my neck of the woods is worthy, though that would seem odd in a town of about 6,300 people and four churches (though I guess you can’t really count the Catholics), as you’d think somebody<\/em><\/strong> would make the cut. But, then again, even though we’re a predominately white God-fearing group, we’re also known for being tolerant, “live-and-let-live” types, so I guess that kept everybody out. <\/p>\n

I haven’t seen much of anything on the news. No reports of vast swaths of empty neighborhoods, no major earthquakes – hell, even my pool skimmer has been toad, lizard, and locust-free. I at least expected to see some of these Kristians interviewed (if they’re still around), and asked whether their calculations are off, or, more likely, God just didn’t want them. I mean, why would the Almighty want to surround himself with closed-minded sanctimonious pricks? If I was made in His image, then clearly He wouldn’t.<\/p>\n

So, I guess it’s a good-news bad-news thing. Good news is no death and destruction (well, no more than usual), bad news is I gotta go back to work tomorrow. Oh, and we’re still stuck with all those self-righteous, sanctimonious hypocrites (who are no doubt poring over their bibles and crunching the numbers to come up with the latest end-of-the-world date). <\/p>\n

You’d think God could’ve at least taken Fred Phelps off our hands. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I didn’t see anybody floating up to heaven yesterday. I did see some airplanes, though, and there was a rainbow in the sky at about 7:00 PM EDT (which would be 6:00 EST, which I’m pretty sure is God’s time zone) even though it hadn’t rained, so I was kind of thinking that was the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5580","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5580","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5580"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5580\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5581,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5580\/revisions\/5581"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5580"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5580"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.morningseditionists.com\/msblog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5580"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}