A special Press the Meat today, as Timmy Potatohead hosts that lying, adulterous, cross-dressing scumbag, Guidi Ruliani for the entire hour. Think Timmuh will hit him with some tough questions? Me neither.

On Faze the Nation, Bush Buddy Bobby Schieffer hosts Jay Rockefeller and Chuck Hagel, on to talk about the CIA destroying the torture tapes, and the latest NIE on Iran.

At Fux News, Weaselface Wallace hosts a fair an balanced pair of candidates, Mike “I never met a serial rapist I didn’t like” Huckabee, and St. John McCain, in addition to the usual panel of assholes, and this week’s “Power Player,” Samuel Lloyd III, dean of Washington National Cathedral.

Over at the Goebbels network, George Snufalufagus hosts Joe Biden and (for some unknown reason), fucking Newt Gingrich (why does this disgraced asshole get any airtime whatsoever?). Then the Axis of Drivel is reunited with a “classic” roundtable of Sam :omg: Donaldson, Cokie “the hag” Roberts and George :jerk: Will. And This Weak’s “Voice” is John Cusack, on to talk about his new film where he plays a father caring for his two children while his wife is serving in Iraq. Better her than me.

Wolf Blitzer’s Late Emission has Pakistan’s “civilian” dictator, Pervez Musharraf, plus whatever congresscritters they can scrounge up.

Later, on 60 Minutes, Anderson Cooper tells us about the mere 700 mountain gorillas left in Africa, Scott Pelley tells us about Prometa, which is the drug that people are getting addicted to so that they can not be addicted to something else, and Bob Simon tells us how wonderful San Diego Chargers RB LaDainian Tomlinson is (seriously, he’s apparently a pretty good person).

And of course, all new Dexter and The Brotherhood. Please, don’t make me go back to work tomorrow!