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Morning Seditionists

Blog Rulz

First off, I hate rules. Or, more precisely, I hate the people that make rules necessary. I’m an anarchist at heart, and if everybody just behaved properly, no rules would be required. Fortunately, we’ve been very lucky to have a community of good, intelligent people who have a sense of humor here. None of these rules are for you, because you don’t need them.

But, for the one or two adolescent little twerps out there with nothing better to do, the following is for you (just so ya know):

  1. No trolls. If you’re a troll, you’ll be dismissed. That goes for known trolls from other blogs, or recently discovered trolls. I get to decide what a troll is, and if I decide you’re a troll, you’re not allowed. This isn’t censorship – you’re more than entitled to go and start your own blog (they’re free), send letters to the editor, or stand out on the corner and spout whatever crap you want. But you’re not welcome here (and, really, is there anything more pathetic than hanging around where nobody likes you?). And now there’s a federal law for people who are deliberately annoying. So go away.
  2. If you are going to attempt to troll, at least be funny. If you’re funny, we might just keep you around for laughs. If you’re just stupid and boring, then there’s really no use for you. Go pay for a membership over at Douche Limbaugh’s or Bill O’Lielly’s site. Or hang out with the freepers. Adolescent, scatalogical, ALL CAPS, repetetive drivel is a big hit with that crowd, so go there. Oh, and nobody bothers to read what you try to post. I used to look at them every once in a while for amusement purposes, but they really weren’t amusing, or even interesting. Now, they just automatically go away without my having to do anything with them. So, keep it up if that’s the only way you get your jollies. :jerk: Just understand, you’re talking to yourself.
  3. This place is for progressives. If you’re a redneck conservative and can express yourself coherently, then fine; all viewpoints are welcome here. Intelligent conversation is encouraged. Be prepared to back up whatever you have to say with facts, be polite, and make sure to bring your sense of humor with you. Yes, you will be held to a higher standard. Think of it as reverse affirmative action. If you’re a neocon, twinkie-ass motherfucker spouting bullshit talking points, then go away. You’re not welcome here. In the United States, there are no downtrodden white guys, persecuted Christians, or anti-Christmas crusaders. Go tell it it your buddy Bill O’leilly.
  4. If you think George W. Bush is doing a great job, you probably just want to stay away from here. Perhaps somebody can recomend a good treatment facility. Pretty much everybody understands what an abysmal failure this administration has been, and if you don’t, it’s either ‘cuz you’re not paying attention, or you’re just not too bright. Either way, go play with your own kind – you’ll be happier, they’ll be happier; it’s a win, all the way around.
  5. No spam. Spam sucks, and so do spammers. If you’re trying to sell something or otherwise pester people, then you’re gone. That goes for porn, too. All porn should be submitted to me directly (except for the gay porn – not that there’s anything wrong with that), so that it can be properly disposed of. And if you try to pull some kind of scam on anybody here or entice people to click on links to malicious web sites or any other kind of crap like that, you will be gone and we will do everything possible to see that you get prosecuted.
  6. Funny. Most people wouldn’t be here if they were “goldbergs” (that is, born without a sense of humor). But for the goldbergs and the professionally offended among us, just because you don’t think something’s funny doesn’t mean it isn’t funny. Lighten up, and let the rest of us have some fun.
  7. I’m into free speech. If “dirty” words offend you, then go away (or, to put it another way, get the fuck out of here). :mrgreen: Seriously, I was a workin’ guy for a long time, and fuck is a pretty good all-purpose word for the working man (and woman; hell, for everybody else I know, really). It works as an adjective, noun, pronoun, verb, adverb, and interjection (you might be able to use it as a preposition and a conjunction, too, if you work at it). But swearing just for the sake of swearing is kind of boring. Used well – and sparingly – it has a much better impact.
  8. Free speech does not equal hate speech. Hate speech, or being deliberately mean or offensive to any person here, (other than a troll or a goldberg) or groups of people in general (other than trolls and goldbergs) is not cool. Hate speech is not tolerated.
  9. If you find an interesting article, post an excerpt or two, and then provide a link to the full story, if you can. And maybe give your take on why you think it’s an interesting article, or why you agree (or don’t agree) with it. That way, anybody that wants to go and read the whole thing can do so, and those that don’t, won’t have to scroll through a big huge comment. Of course, if you have a lot of original stuff to say, then feel free to say it – take as long as you like. It’s just that, if it’s available elsewhere, then give us the opportunity to read it elsewhere. Oh, and don’t forget to attribute it to the original author.
  10. That’s all I can think of right now, but I thought it looked better with ten.