Ah, the start of another week. We’re going to cool off here, which is fine by me. I hate the hot weather. Summer makes me long for fall. So does this movie, which I can’t wait to see.

Howard Dean visits with Timmy Potatohead on today’s Press the Meat, followed by a roundtable of Dean David Broder, John “the dick” Dickerson, PBS’s Gwen Ifill, Mrs. Alan Greenspan, Andrea Mitchell & frequent Countdown guest, Richard Wolffe.

Over at CBS, Bob Schieffer has David Axelrod of the Obama Campaign and Howard Wolfson of the Clinton Campaign, plus former CBS News dude (back when they had news), Roger Mudd.

On the Goebbels network, tiny little George Snufalufagus has Evan Bayh, Tom Daschle, Artur Davis, and Sheila Jackson Lee. Then there’s a roundtable of snarky ‘heather’ Maureen Dowd, political mastermind Donna Brazile, Matthew Dowd (no relation,) and George :jerk: Will.

Weaselface Wallace hosts the embodiment of all that is evil, flag pin-less Barack Obama, plus the usual Fuxheads.

CNN’s Late Emission has DINO Dianne Feinstein, Pete “hokie” Hoekstra, Claire McCaskill, representing the evil Obama, Chuck Schumer, representing Clinton, Susan Rice, Obama Foreign Policy Adviser and Jamie Rubin, Clinton Foreign Policy Adviser. Plus Steve Coll of the New America Foundation and Peter Bergen, CNN’s scaremonger.

Later, on 60 Minutes, Antonin “Fat Tony” Scalia tells us to “get over” Bush v. Gore, and Bob Simon reports on the Israeli Air Force (who will presumably help President Clinton obliterate – or is it annihilate – Iran).

No more John Adams, but there’s a new episode of The Tudors tonight, and what I think is the season finale (way too soon) of Tracey Ullman’s State of the Union.

Have a good Sunday. And Happy Birthday to my mom, who would have been 84 today (she’d be pissed I said how old she was).

Nice to wake up to the sound of birds singing in the morning again. Too bad they have to come with black fly season (soon to progress to deer fly season) and thunderstorm season (which scares the dog) and too damn hot season.

I tried not to pay attention to the returns last night, but of course it was impossible to ignore completely. Last I saw, it looked like it was jumping around from about 6% to 10% win for Clinton (less than a 10 delegate pick up). Much less than the 20% lead she had not long ago, and far less than the 65% or so of the vote she needed to make any sort of dent in Obama’s lead. Whatever it finally wound up being, I’m sure it’ll be spun as a great Clinton victory by the traditional media. Whatever. I mostly don’t care anymore. I’m just glad it’s finally over (six or seven or whatever it was weeks between primaries is way too long in today’s nauseating news cycles). Now it’s on to wherever the hell the next one is at, and to all the asinine questions and teevee ads that come along with it. Whoopie.

Oh, and Happy Birthday Melina, wherever you are. What are you, 29 now?

So, big day, what with the PA primary and all. I’d love to see this whole thing wrapped up today, but that won’t happen. Obama won’t win today, and however small a margin Clinton wins by (and to make any dent in either the popular vote or the delegate count, she needs to get something like 65% of the vote in the rest of the primary states), she won’t do the whole party unity thing and get behind the party’s nominee. That’s because she’s running for 2012 at this point, and the only way she can run for 2012 is if there’s a Republican in the White House for another four years.

I voted for Clinton here in NY. It was a pretty ambivalent vote, since neither of them had done much to distinguish themselves in my eyes, and they are, really, just about as identical as two different people can get on the issues (those are those things that you never hear about in the campaign coverage). Since then, though, two things have happened. I’ve lost all respect for Clinton, in her attempts to scare the white folks while lauding John McCain as the only viable alternative to her. And Obama has actually attempted to speak to us as if we weren’t a bunch of mouth-breathing idiots. Maybe he hasn’t been perfect in his words, but (surprise, surprise) the people actually seem to get it. Yeah, we are fucking bitter, and we have damn good reason to be.

So, while Obama will never be the perfect progressive candidate that I’d like him to be, I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. I guess I’m with Maron on this. And I’m really sick and tired of the same-old, same-old, and that seems to be all that Clinton and McCain have to offer. So I’m ready for something new.

Aint gonna happen today, though.

It’s Monday again. That’s nice. As usual, I have nothing to say, except I’m having a harder and harder time going out and being amongst people these days. I just wanna win the lottery and become a hermit already.

The interesting thing about our media is that they have no clue whatsoever just how godawful they are. It’s really quite astounding. If you got the sense they at least understood what they were and were ashamed of themselves, it wouldn’t be quite so maddening. But, instead, the Sunday whore shows just keep on going.

On Press the Meat, Timmy Potatohead will ask inane ‘gotcha’ questions of Obama’s Chief Strategist David Axelrod and Hillary Clinton’s new chief strategist Geoff Garin. Then, it’s a roundtable with NY Times whore David Brooks (who thought ABC did a great fucking job on Wednesday) E.J. “Poupon” Dionne of the WaPost, and NPR’s Michele Norris.

The battle of the surrogates continues on CBS (god forbid these people ever get a unique idea) with Bob Casey (Obama) and Ed Rendell (Clinton) getting together with Bush Buddy Bobby Schieffer on Faze the Nation. Then it’s media whore Roger Simon of the ever-wrong Politico, and Joe “hippy dippy” Trippi.

Far be it for Fux News Sunday to be original, as they have Dick Durbin (Obama) and Chuck Schumer (Clinton), along with the Pillsbury Dough Nazi, Karl Rove. Speaking of Nazis, the Fuxheads will also be on hand to talk about the Pope’s visit to NYC (I think they ought to get him tickets to see “The Producers”).

Over at that bastion of integrity known as ABC (but to us, it’ll always be the Goebbels Network), George Snufalufagus will suck off St. McCain (interview posted below), before This Weak reunites the Axis of Drivel, Cokie “the hag” Roberts, Sam :omg: Donaldson, and George :jerk: Will. And don’t forget, for those of you lucky enough to get your locals in HD, you get to see Cokie in Hi-Def this week!

On CNNs Late Emission, Wolfie is live in NYC to give us “the latest” on the Pope, plus there’s Clinton surrogates Jon Corzine and Mike “fluffer” Nutter along with Obama surrogates Bill Bradley and Chaka Fattah (seriously). The there’s the woman HP gave the boot to (poor baby only got $21 million in severance), Carly Fiorina,(now McCain’s Economic Adviser), and trying to see how many popes they can find in the pizza (you would think that would be on YouTube, but I can’t find it), Catholic University President David O’Connell, and “Vatican Journalist” Delia Gallagher.

Later, on 60 Minutes, it’s three stories I don’t really give a shit about, but after that, there’s the seventh and final episode of John Adams, the Tudors, and another episode of Tracy Ullman’s State of the Union.

Have a good Sunday, y’all.

I think today is gonna have to be one of those YouTube copout kinda days.