I really don’t have much to say, but I figured I ought to get at least two posts in for February, and seeing as it isn’t a leap year, I guess I better get one in today. Back in the olden days, if there was an Olympics then it was leap year. But somewhere along the way they changed that and now they’ve got one every couple of years. I don’t know if that’s why the Olympics have become uninteresting to me (not quite as special as they used to be), or if it’s just because I’m an old man now and nothing is all that interesting to me anymore. Or maybe it’s just because back when there were only four teevee channels anything different was a big deal.

Actually, we got a fifth channel (off and on) when I was a kid. When atmospheric conditions permitted, we’d pick up Channel 11 from Kingston Ontario. So while everyone seemed enthralled by Curling at this year’s Olympics, it was old hat to me ‘cuz we’d watch Curling every Saturday morning in the winter. Winter, because there weren’t any fancy indoor arenas for that sort of thing back then – instead it was played outdoors on a frozen lake or something. And they didn’t have any fancy fiberglass and nylon brooms, either. Pretty sure they just grabbed a broom from the closet and headed out to the pond. Ah, those were the days.

I did watch about 15 minutes of Canada vs. Norway (or maybe it was Sweden, I don’t know – lots of white people either way) Curling, but that was about it. When I was a kid I really got into the ski jumping and of course the downhill skiing (anybody remember Jean-Claude Killy?).

If I was running the US Olympic Committee, I’d save a ton of money by just having Donald Trump be on every team. Pretty sure there’s nothing he can’t do and he’s an incredible athlete, from what I understand. But maybe the summer games are more his style. I know you ladies are just dying to see him in track shorts or – if your hearts can take it – in Speedos for the Platform Diving. And in the swimming events, he wouldn’t need a swim cap – he can just take his hair off to be hydrodynamic.

But he might turn the water orange.

Now that the weather’s warming up around here, I’ve been able to wear the waxed canvass rain jacket I bought last fall, just before the weather turned to shit. It’s very nice, but the problem with it is that it’s Irish (I went on a bit of an Irish shopping binge last year – mostly Irish wool sweaters, a knit cap, and a wool scarf. What can I say, I’m a sucker for that Irish shit. My mother would be so happy) and apparently a lot of European shit has the bass-ackward zippers and buttons (I even had to double-check my order, ‘cuz I thought I’d somehow managed to by a women’s jacket). Something to do with the high-class people having servants to dress them back in the day, so all the posh stuff has left-handed fasteners.

I know you women have been forced to deal with this stupidity all your lives, so I won’t complain too much, but it’s amazing to me how goddamn difficult it’s been to get used to zipping the thing up (never mind the snaps). You wouldn’t think it would be that big a deal (and maybe I’m just spastic, I dunno), but, damn, it’s surprisingly difficult.

Oh well, I suppose I ought to get back to doing whatever it is I ought to be doing. Here’s to hoping we have an early spring and a better summer than last year.