Kind of a strange Press the Meat today, as Timmy potatohead hosts a “debate” on the future of the Democratic party, between creepy DLC Chairman Harold Ford Jr, and the likewise creepy Markos Moulitsas (sorry, he just gives me the creeps for some reason; I think it’s because he looks so much like that guy Eugene Tooms, from the X-Files, who’d wake up every 30 years to eat human livers, and could squeeze himself up the soil pipe and into your toilet). Then it’s back to the usual stuff – a bunch of flat heads at the round table – with Bloomberg’s Margaret Carlson (who’s got the the hots for some of that Fred Thompson man meat), Time magazine hack Michael Duffy, NBC’s twinkie-ass Republican shill, Chuck Todd, and idiot (but no savant) Byron York, of the National Review.

Over at CBS’s Faze the Nation, it’s the hacktacular, former third-place “Worst Person in the World” award winning Karen “Humpty” Tumulty of Time, David Yepsen of the Des Moines Register (since we’re supposed to give a shit about Iowa, I guess), former crappy staff writer from the WaPost (who fits right in at the ever-incorrect Politico.com), Jim VandeHei, and Mike “Huckleberry” Huckabee, who apparently still thinks he’s running for preznit.

On Fux News Sunday, Weaselface Wallace travels to Iowa to audition as wife number 2 with Mitt and Ann Romney, and then it’s a panel of Republican shills on to tell us why the Democrats suck (as if we needed anybody to tell us that).

This Weak with George Snufalufagus forces us to listen to Sam Bareback, before giving us a little (no pun intended) Dennis Kucinich (apparently, he’s on on so Georgie can ask him why he doesn’t quit already). Then at the roundtable, it’s George :jerk: Will, Fareed “Token” Zakaria, former Pentagon spokesbitch, Torie Clarke and campaign mastermind, Donna Brazile. Then, Leonardo DiCaprio will be on to talk about his environmental documentary “The 11th Hour” (if he doesn’t mention Thom Hartman, Thommy’ll be crushed).

Wolf Blitzer only manages one Democrat on his Late Emission – Andy’s boy, Joe Sestak. Otherwise, it’s scumbag Republican day, with Drunken Duncan Hunter, Transportation Secretary, Mary Peters (let me guess “be vewy, vewy afwaid,” but not so afraid you stop buying shit), and dirtbag representatives from the campaigns of dirtbags, Rudy “9/11 Action Hero” Giuliani, Mitt “Biog Love” Romney, and the man who reminds me of Bruce Willis’ character in “The Sixth Sense” (because he doesn’t know he’s dead yet), St. John McCain. Oh, and Wolfie tosses in Pakistani Ambassador Mahmud Ali Durrani, for good measure (must be Karen Hughes was busy; oh well, I’m sure Durrani’s better looking, anyway). Plus, the usual collection of CNN hacks and shills.

Later, on 60 Minutes, they’ll rerun segments on the kid who escaped from Darfur, Anderson Cooper on the hip-hop scene, and a story about somebody they’re actually calling the “King of Comedy.” Yes, none other than Larry the Cable Guy, who I’ve actually never seen, but I bet he’s no Harland Williams. All that, and Andy Rooney too? It’s just too much goodness for a one-hour show.

Damn, when the hell is football gonna hurry up and get back (and, no, preseason doesn’t count). Enjoy your Sunday, everybody, and if you can’t make it to church today…

There’s way too much to do this weekend. I have to brew a batch of beer, and bottle another one. Maybe even two. Oh, and all that other piddly shit that makes the weekends go all too quickly.

OK, so, just hypothetically speaking, suppose it’s Hillary. Who’s the VP gonna be? Not so much who you want it to be (or we wouldn’t be supposing Hillary in the first place), but who you think it will be – or at least who you think it ought to be. I think Hillary/Edwards would be a pretty powerful ticket. I have doubts that he’d go for the VP slot. From Hillary’s perspective, I think Joe Biden would be a good choice. He’s got a pretty good resume, a good amount of experience, and could temper any fears of Hillary being too “girly.” Though, if you think Hillary’s too girly, you haven’t been paying attention. It’s my biggest fear that Hillary will invade somebody to avoid looking “soft” on whatever it is that we frown about looking soft on. Terrorism, I s’pose it is, these days. It’s been plenty of other things, over the years. It mostly boils down to “us” vs. “them.” For the rationale, anyway. The real reason for invading countries is far more simple. It’s all about the money.

In the case of Iraq, the plain and simple truth is that this country runs (or slithers, perhaps) on oil. A presidential candidate can’t pretend that the Middle East isn’t strategically important. Sorry, it is. Until we have a president that actually wants to get us off the foreign oil (like now, please).

We went to Iraq to establish the largest military base in the world in the middle of a country that sits on the world’s #3 oil resources. And to control access to the Persian Gulf (which is what the first Iraq War was really all about). Our country runs on oil, and it makes a very few people a shitload of money. We need to cut these leeches off. We’ve already spent almost half a trillion on this Iraq occupation to control the oil so that we can pay three bucks a gallon for gas, while Exxon makes record profits. We’re paying from both ends.

Anyhow, it’s Friday. Go out and fry something – perhaps even your mind….

People keep talking about having rage fatigue. I got past that quite some time ago. Now I just have fatigue fatigue. Plus, you’d think today would be Friday, but it aint. I just don’t see how I can keep this up for another 20 years. That’s if Bush doesn’t just end the world before he leaves office (if he leaves office).

Sorry, I’ve been staring at this blank text box for quite a while now, and I’ve got nothing to write. Just seems like it’s the same old shit every day. The Republicans are evil, the Democrats suck, last year was the hottest on record, the polar ice caps are gonna be gone in 15 years, the Chinese are gonna start selling their dollars, I didn’t win the lottery again, we’re waist deep in the big muddy, Hillary sucks, work sucks, Air America sucks, Fred Phelps sucks, everything sucks, sucks, sucks. It used to suck, it still sucks, and it’s probably always gonna suck. And it’s all just the same.

So, Feingold and Hinchey introduced resolutions in the House and Senate to censure Bush, Cheney, and Gonzo. :yawn: That ought to put the fear of jebus into ’em. Not that they’ll pass, of course. Odds are, they won’t even make it to the floor for a vote. Certainly not in the Senate, where all the Republicans, Lieberman, and probably a few weaselly DINOs will make sure to filibuster it. I think they should also send Bush a sternly worded letter, just to let them know they mean bidness.

Monday, after a pretty tough weekend for our civil rights. Both the House and Senate caved in after president bunny pants threw hi little tantrum. Looks like if we want to save our way of life – if we want the Constitution of the United States of America to be preserved, protected, and defended – we’ll have to do it ourselves. Not today, though. I have to go to work.

Press the Meat looks typically dull this morning, as the man with the head like a potato hosts SecDef Robert Gates. For what reason? Maybe to tell us how great everything’s going, which doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be scared to death of homemade submarines being towed around in our ports, menacing our big cruise ship tourist attractions. As long as we’re afraid (BTW, am I just not getting it? ‘Cuz, I don’t seem to be feeling much in the way of patriotic fear and anxiety), maybe we won’t notice that our steam pipes are exploding, our levees are failing, and our bridges are collapsing. Then it’s an “in-depth roundtable” on the “qualities and character traits” of the presidential candidates, with Carl Bernstein, on to push his Hillary book, CBN’s David Brody will be on to tell us what god thinks, presidential historian Doris Kearns Goodwin will hopefullt tell us how historically tragic the Bush presidency has been (like we don’t already know that), and David Mendell of the Chicago Tribune will be on to shill for his new Barack Obama book. What, nobody on to talk about the candidate that choosy polygamists are choosing this year? Or why what America needs is a cross-dressing multiple divorcee?

Over on CBS, Bush Buddy Bobby Schieffer trots out the Lizard Woman, Condi Rice, as well as Rahm Emanuel. Gee, there’s two people I wanna look at on Sunday morning.

Over at Fux News Sunday, Weaselface Wallace gets himself some lizard action, and then the two hacks who claim to have been Bush “critics” – except they weren’t – Michael O’Hanlon and Ken Pollack of the Brookings Institution will tell us how, finally, things are going just fucking great in Iraq, and then the WaPost’s “fashion critic” Robin Givhan will be on to tell us that Hillary Clinton has tits.

Oh, but wait, it’s an exciting day at the Goebbels network, as George Snufalufagus hosts a special 90-minute debate with all nine of the Republican presidential candidates – Sleepy, Dopey, Grumpy, Polygamy – all your favorites will be there to out-torture and out-terror each other. Talk about your must-see teevee.

Wolf Blitzer’s Late Emission includes Robert Gates, Afghani Prez, Hamid Karzai, Carl Levin, former Pakistani Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto, and a collection of CNN hacks.

Later, on 60 Minutes, tonight’s collection of re-run segments includes Bob Simon, doing a story about that wonderful fantasy world of Kurdistan, where Americans are liked, violence is rare, the women are strong, the men are good looking, and all the children are above average. Then Steve Kroft tells us of the capture of Scilian Mafia head, Bernardo Provenzano. And, finally, there’s Morley Safer’s segment on British actress Helen Mirren. :yawn:

Finally, please join me in wishing a Happy Birthday to Raging Granny (as well as my brother, Tim) today. Granny turns 21 today, so now I can finally get her to go out and buy beer. Consider this your birthday card, honey. I’ll slip you a little something extra later on tonight.

Enjoy your Sunday.

This is gonna be one of those “not much to say today” days. Stay off the bridges.

It’s Friday. And tonight is the big clambake for my department, which should be OK, I guess. Ordinarily, I’d get hammered, but I reckon that wouldn’t be a great career move. Plus, I have to drive, so that wouldn’t work out at all. I also don’t much care for crappy beer in plastic cups. I’ve gotten rather snobbish these days. If it’s not my own beer, I much prefer Middle Ages Brewery’s Impaled Ale. And I only drink beer from a frozen mug.

Turns out, I love beer. No, not that I really like to drink it (though I do), but that I feel real affection for the stuff. Especially since I started brewing it myself. It’s a living, breathing entity, and I feel true affection for it. I understand why Ben Franklin said “beer is proof that God loves us, and wants us to be happy.” Hey, give me a break. It’s pretty much all I’ve got these days.