Hey, I hope everybody had a nice day yesterday, whether you were one of the many people who had to work to keep things running, or you had the day off and were either celebrating with family, or just enjoying a long weekend. Today is the first day of Kwanzaa, which runs through January 1st, so here’s to a Joyous week, culminating, of course, in the Twilight Zone Marathon (when we play the “how many seconds will it take to identify the episode” game – anything over ten seconds, and you have to drink). If you’re heading back to work today (as my wife is), well, sucks to be you. At least it’s a short week, with another long weekend to look forward to. Except I think we’re stuck with a whole lot of AAR reruns. Fresh Malloy tonight, though (I think), and don’t forget that if you’re in the San Fran area, you can catch Marc tonight or tomorrow at Cobb’s. Have a good one.

For those of you celebrating the holiday today, I hope Santa was good to you.  I think his sleigh got stuck in the mud, here.  No white Christmas in the ‘Cuse, but we’re finally supposed to get a little snow tomorrow, they say, which would give us a white Kwanzaa.  Somewhat ironic, doncha think?

Twas the day before Christmas, and what do we see? A buncha fuckin’ wingnuts, all over the teevee.

On Press the Meat, Timmy Potatohead tries to infuse us with some of that old-time religion, as he hosts Rick Warren, Pastor of the Saddleback Church (who is apparently a bit controversial with the rest of the Christo-fascist zombie brigade, having deigned to invite that heathen Barack Obama to speak at his church), and Newsweek editor, author of “American Gospel,” and smug self-righteous DC “insider,” John Meachem. Then it’ll be the ghost of Robert Frost, and a stirring combination of death and Christianity, as the United States Navy Band Brass Quartet favors us with a few holiday ditties.

Over on CBS’s Faze the Nation, Bush Buddy Bobby Schieffer gets an exclusive one-on-one with Thorazine Queen Laura Bush, who will be on to talk about the shin tumor she had removed, and whether or not it was more qualified to be president than that dry (at best) drunk moron she’s shacked up with.

Over on the Goebbels Network, George Snufalufagus has the day’s token Democrat, Chris Dodd, on with li’l Lindsey Graham, to talk about what a great idea it is to send a “surge” of troops to Iraq. Plus, new UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon will be on for some holiday talk of genocide in Darfur, and war in Iraq. Then George Bush the first and his evil hag of a wife Barbara are on to talk about how well the colored folks from New Orleans are doing, and to talk about the work of the Salvation Army (hopefully their idiot son isn’t planning on deploying them to Iraq). And, proving once again that you can, in fact, put a square head around a Roundtable, it’s George :jerk: Will, plus ABC reporter Jonathan Karl, and Melinda Henneberger of HuffingtonPost.com.

Over at Fux News Sunday, it’s Mrs. Darth Cheney, whose lesbian fantasy novel turned their daughter Mary gay. Fuxface Chris Wallace will also have the archbishop of Washington DC, Donald Wuerhl, and Billy Graham’s daughter. Wow, better fire up the DVR for that one.

Over at Wolf Blitzer’s Late Emission, it’s your chance to see all those interviews you weren’t interested in the first time around, as Wolfie reruns his greatest hits, including such classic guests as the Chimp in Chief, his pet Lizard Queen, and of course Lynne Cheney. Plus Wolfie will toss in a few token Democrats, and maybe some Arabs and Israeli’s for good measure.

Later, on 60 Minutes, Scott Pelley does a story on ocean swimmer Lynne Cox, Lesley Stahl reports on Rex, who was born blind and with severe brain damage, but plays a mean piano, and Bob Simon visits the elephant orphanage.

No Simspons tonight, but you can watch Spiderman on Fox instead, or, better yet, catch It’s a Wonderful Life on NBC. Yeah, you’ve seen it a billion times, but what the hell, it’s still a classic. Then put some cookies out for Santa, and get to bed early.

Have a good Sunday.

This has got to be the most un-holiday like weather I’ve ever seen here.  Sure, we’ve had green Christmases before, but, damn, this rain is really annoying.  At least it keeps the riff-raff away from the park.  Only the real dog people go out in this crap.  Unfortunately, the streets seem to be packed with cars.  I suppose they’re out shopping or something.  Yuck.  I think I’ll just go back to bed, and wait for it all to be over.  See ya.

Well, today is the first day of winter, with winter solstice having arrived at 7:22 Eastern Time last night.  The days can start getting longer again, now.  And, it’s the end of another week.  A pretty good week, too – at least for me.  No blizzards, Marc Maron on the radio, almost like the old days, and school’s out, but it’s too early to worry about grades coming in.  It’s kind of like when you buy a new car, but the payment book hasn’t arrived in the mail yet.  Nothing against Sam Seder, of course, but it’s really too bad Marc can’t be on the radio every day again.  I don’t know about y’all, but I seem to enjoy him being on in the morning again, more than his evening show (of course, I got to listen to him live this week, which was pretty much out of the question when he was on at night from the West Coast – and when they went to the taped version, it had kind of a “canned” feel to it.  But it was still better than anything else on the radio, IMHO).

So, pick them fleas outta your armpit hair, and then sit back and enjoy one last show.  Then get out there and shop – your preznit commands it!

It’s always uplifting to listen to our president speak, especially when he’s talking about making sure our military is ready to stay in Iraq forever.  I don’t know where he plans on getting the troops (his stirring oratory aside).  There’s something like 2.1 million Americans in prison, so there must be a couple hundred thousand so desperate to get out that they’ll take a tour or two in Iraq.

Bush also said the insurgents are making things tough on our military over there.  See?  And you guys thought he wasn’t paying attention.  He also said, “Retreat would embolden radicals. It would hurt the credibility of the United States.”  Yeah.  Wouldn’t want that, would we?  Not when things are going so well.

I’m starting to think it’ll be a real miracle if we make it January 20, 2009. Hell, at this rate, we’ll be luck to make to New Year’s.

It’s only Wednesday?  Damn, it feels like it’s Friday already.  Not that I’m complaining.  Sure is cool to be able to listen to Marc every day again, isn’t it?  Have a good one.

Well, I was gonna get the Xmas cards out yesterday. Honest. But there was only one problem; I don’t know where we keep the Xmas cards. So, not much I can do until somebody provides me with that information, is there? I really wish I had one of those signing machine things that Rummy used to send out the “Dear <insert name here>, thanks for letting us use your <son> <daughter> < father> <mother> <husband> <wife> <sister> <brother> <other> as cannon fodder, in service of our glorious leader” notifications. That would come in pretty handy. Plus, I could contract the job out to Haliburton or something.

I set up a database one year that included personalized greetings. Printed the envelopes, and the message right on the cards – including my personal signature. Took me about 10 times longer than it would have just to write the goddamn things out myself, but it was pretty cool. So, I was able to achieve an impersonal look, at the cost of hundreds of hours of labor. Pretty good. The hard part was measuring all the cards to get the damn things to print out right. Imagine if I actually had friends! Anyhow, I’m starting to think the e-cards are really the environmentally friendly way to save the trees and all that.

Don’t forget (and I know you won’t), day two of Maron on the Sam Seder Show.

God, it feels good to be on vacation.  I already don’t want to go back in January (barely even a month off, fer chrissakes).  And what a great way to start vacation, with a full week of pseudo Morning Sedition.  I wonder if Marc will get Riley to hang out at all?  Well, I guess I better get to work on my Holiday Cards (though I’m sure he never reads anything I write, I hope that somehow, some way, that pisses Bill O’Lielly off).

So, the Democrats won 30 House seats (probably 31, counting FL-13), and took back the Senate (much as the Republican media vultures would like Tim Johnson to croak). So naturally, Timmy Potatohead invites one of the most irrelevant Republicans (next to George W. Bush) out there – the Newtster – to Press his Meat. Then it’s a couple of Republican media whores from the NY Times, David Brooks, and Tom “my head is flat” Friedman. Whoopie!

Over at CBS, Bush buddy Bobby Schieffer has an “exclusive” interview with Colin “the gutless wonder” Powell, who will no doubt tell us that, now that everybody else has finally realized Iraq was a lie and a scandal – and we’re so far into it, that there’s no “good” way out for anybody – he’s willing to criticize the cowards, traitors, liars, and thieves in the Bush Administration, too. Woulda been heroic before we’d gotten into this mess. Now, it’s just kinda pathetic.

Over on the Goebbels Network, Harry Reid joins George Snufalufagus, to tell us that, sorry, Tim Johnson’s not dead yet, and, at the Roundtable, it’s George :jerk: Will, EJ “Grey Poupon” Dionne of the WaPost, Time’s Richard “don’t call me Caasey” Stengel, of Time Magazine and Republican mouthpiece Torie Clarke. Then, the star of Grey’s Anatomy will be on to find a cure for malaria.

On Fux News Sunday, Teddy Kennedy goes one-on-one with Weaselface Wallace.  I hope he kicks his ass.

Over on CNN’s Late Emission, it’s, well, who really cares about CNN?

Later, on 60 Minutes, Scott Pelley interviews three Holocaust survivors who see their archived German records for the first time, Lesley Stahl reports on Family Finding, an organization that locates family members of unadopted foster-care children, and Bob Simon for some reason profiles Dan “Larry the Cable Guy” Whitney.

Have a good one.