So, a priest, a nun a rabbi, a Protestant, and a Muslim all walk into a TV studio and sit down with Mr. Potatohead. That’s no joke, it’s today’s edtion of Press the Meat, and Timmuh will toss in a “Meet the Press Minute” with Billy Graham, who is apparently not dead yet.

On Fazed the Nation, Bush buddy Bob Schieffer has New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson and Republican George “Turd” Allen.

Over at ABC, George Snufalufagus has Richard Myers – one of the few remaining retired Generals who don’t think Rummy should be frog-marched out of the DoD. I guess Myers is hoping for a seat on the Carlyle Group’s board. Then it’s Republican Dick Lugar of Indiana, along with Republican-lite Evan Bayh, also of Indiana. At the roundtable it’s Slimey Joe Klein of Time, political mastermind of the Gore Campaign, Donna Brazile, and George :jerk: Will, and Harry Connick Jr. will be on to talk about his work with Habitat for Humanity in New Orelans.

On Fux News Sunday, Chris “Dickface” Wallace has asshole Republican Mitch McConnell of TN and Chris Dodd of CT to tlak about our next glorious war with Iran, and then Newt Gingrich stops by to prove that you’re never too irrelevant, or too much of an asshole, to be on Fox. Plus, a seasonal scare story about the IRS.

CNN’s Late Edition has Samir Sumaidaie (the Iraqi ambassador to the U.S.), Dianne Feinstein, Republican douchebag Duncan Hunter (possbily the biggest player in quashing any meaningful investigation into Abu Ghraib, and a big force behind ignoring the 9/11 Commisison’s recommendations), and, speaking of evil, they’ll have both HenryKissinger and Jerry Falwell (just out of curiosity, why would you have Jerry Falwell on any legitimate news program. Oh, that’s right, it’s CNN). Plus, retired Army Brig. Gen. David Grange.

On 60 Minutes, Bob Simon goes into one of Israel’s maximum security prisons to speak with three Palestinian terrorists, Lesley Stahl tells us there’s a shortage of babes in China, and EdBradley does a segment on Jamie Oliver, who I gather is a teevee chef.

On the West Wing, they’ll be burying poor Leo (but who will the new VP be?), and we’ll see if Tony’s done puking up blood on the Sopranos. Have a nice Sunday.

Holy shit, halfway through April already. The good news is you don’t have to stress about those taxes, ‘cuz we’ve got until, what, Tuesday, I think (if you file in Andover, MA – love that Patriot Day holiday). Monday, for everybody else. The bad news is, well, just go to any news site, bad news is all over the place.

Anyhow, I’ve got way too much to do today (though I did get the dump run out of the way yesterday – but did I get any credit for it? No, I did not), and my back is killing me (there are those who think clumping cat litter is a miracle; personally, I think it just makes for some very heavy shit), so I can’t sit here and type much longer. Have a good Saturday.

Hey, somebody remind me to mail my taxes in today (I’d hate to leave it ’til the last minute).

Clippers tonight, so it’s half a show (give or take) for the streamers, and the “premium” subscribers can decide whether they want to listen to the last half of the show first and then wait until whenever the podcast gets posted to listen to the first part, or just wait and listen to the whole thing all at once. Seems kinda f*cked up, doesn’t it?

The good news, though, is that this should be the last regular season game that screws with the show, since the final three games are early starts (and one’s on Sunday anyway). The bad news is that they’re in the playoffs, so let’s hope for an early exit (at this point, it looks like they’ll be playing Denver, so here’s to a big series from Carmello Anthony, who brought Syracuse its 2003 National Championship – and who shoulda stayed all four years, damnit, or at least for two).

Anyway, on today’s show Sammy the Stem Cell returns, plus Ian Gillan from Deep Purple (if you’re my age and you’ve ever picked up a guitar, you’ve no doubt fingered out “Smoke on the Water”), as well as comedian (and the Hard half of Hard ‘n Phirm) Chris Hardwick. Maybe we should start a pool to see which part of the show we’ll actually get to hear.

Good Friday, everybody. Though I’m not sure what there is about a person getting nailed to a cross that can be considered “good.” Hell of a way to end the week if you ask me. Bloody Romans.

Apparently in England, New Zealand, and Australia (if Wikipedia can be believed), they celebrate the day by eating hot cross buns. Catholics are supposed to observe fasting and abstinence today (my guess is I’ll go one-for-two), and in Ireland they ban the sale of alcohol and close the pubs . 😯 For yet another reason to move to Canada, consider that today is part of a four-day weekend that runs through Easter Monday (legal pot and the Easter Bunny – good thing insulin’s cheap up there). For the record, I think we ought to get off for all of Passover, Chanukah, Kwanza, Black History Month, Chinese New year, and any other holidays I may have left out.

Speaking of left out, have I somehow missed a big stink and cry over the “War on Easter” from John Gibson, Bill O’Reilly, and the rest of the Kritstian Krusaders? I mean, Easter’s the money shot, Christ-wise. Not that I claim to be an expert (being a religious-ed dropout, I learned most of what I know from movies like “The Robe” – which they showed on TV every year when I was a kid – and “The Ten Commandments.” For instance, did you know they had very perky breasts, back in bible times?), but X-mas is really pretty minor compared to Easter (I mean, anybody can get born, but that resurrection stuff is quite a trick).

Anyway, whatever your faith (or lack thereof), have a good Friday.

Even we streamers will get the whole show tonight, since there’s no Clippers game. On tonight’s show, it’s Paul Waldman from Media Matters, on to talk about his new book, Being Right Is Not Enough: What Progressives Must Learn From Conservative Success. Also on the show, anti-aspertame crusader Betty Martini and comedian Harland Williams.

Holy Thursday, it’s the first day of Passover! I think. I’m really not all that up on the wole religion thing, so if I’m wrong please forgive me. Other than that, I have no idea waht’s going on in the world, except that the Republicans have finally found a big huge scandal to exploit, and that’s that two of John Conyers’ former staff members say he made them baby-sit his kids, run errands, and work on political campaigns. I, for one, am outraged! Oh, there was also stuff about our troops getting sick from the recycled sewage that Halliburton’s been giving them to drink, and Bush burying another Dubai deal in the works, as well as witholding the whole fake Biolab trailer park report, and, yeah, they really are planning on nuking Iran, but goddamn it, somebody better get to the bottom of this babysitting thing!

OK, well, there’s a Clippers game tonight, so it’ll be a short show for those of us who are trying to listen to the stream, and a full two hours for you lucky “premium” members. On the show, it’ll be Tony Hendra, to talk about his new book, The Messiah of Morris Avenue, plus Playwright Peter Morris, ans New York Time’s reporter, Shaila Dewan. And, Jim will do his Wheel of Anger. Of course, you’ll have to tune in to see which parts actually make it on the air.

I have to get up and out so I can get back and do all the shit I need to do before midnight tonight. Keep an eye on the news, and let me know if we’ve nuked Iran or anything.

No Clippers, so it’ll be a full two hours. On the show tonight will be (or, was, since I reckon it’s already in the can) journalist Marc Cooper, the Executive Director of Band of Brothers, Mike Lyon, Terry Zwigoff will be on to talk about his new film, Art School Confidential, and also comedian/songwriter, Henry Phillips.

Supposed to be another beautiful day where I live, but I have so much to do, I don’t know if I’ll get to see much of it. Looks like Berlusconi’s out in Italy, unless they managed to put the fix in overnight. There aren’t too many Bush Buddies left in office around the world. I only hope that trend continues in this country come November. Hopefully there won’t be any nuking of Iran before then.